Lord Bonkers' Diary: Call Clegg

Friday

If I say it myself, I have something of a brainwave over breakfast and ring Matron at the Bonkers Home for Well-Behaved Orphans as soon as I have dealt with the eggs and b.

Sure enough, the victor in yesterday’s quiz is soon announced. I hand him read a few thoughts I have jotted down on the subject of school meals and then dial a number and handed him the telephone. “It’s the Deputy Prime Minister, young man” I explain. “I am sure he would like to speak to you.”

You probably heard what ensued. After the lad’s sterling performance, I felt it only right to stretch his prize to a second bag of toffees.

Lord Bonkers was Liberal MP for Rutland South-West 1906-10.

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